Hi there,

I've had one date off Gumtree in the past. Let's just say it wasn't a great success and it put me off for a while. But I'm sure there're some great people out there so I'm back to try again. Anyway, here's what happened.

This was about 3 years ago. We swapped some emails, she sent me a pic (crowd scene, her in the back and blurry but looked cute enough). We arranged to meet in Covent Garden for a date. All seemed good and I was looking forward to it. So the night arrives.

Within 30 seconds it was obvious that there were a few things she hadn't told me about herself.

1. She had a pronounced limp. This isn't really a problem. I don't know why I even mention it.

2. She had a lisp. Not a cute lisp but a spitting-all-over-me-whenever-she-spoke kinda lisp. Not something that stirred my passions if I'm honest.

3. This was the dealbreaker. She had a moustache. A full-on frigging moustache! I have no problem with ladies going au naturel but this was ridiculous. She probably strokes it like a Bond villain planning evil. You think my lips are going anywhere near that???

Anyway, we had a couple of drinks and I politely made my excuses and left. Let me be clear, I have my faults too. I drink, I have been known to swear. I myself can go several days between shaves. But wow!

So there's my little story. Not a great one but I hope you liked reading it. I've probably put you off emailing me now, but I'm hoping there's someone out there thinking, "I don't have a moustache. He'll like me!" And I won't be writing about any future dates. That one was so terrible that, that, well, I'm speechless now.

So, me, I'm 29, live in NW London and work in the city. Laid back and easy-going, love gigs, movies, exploring, sitting in the pub putting the world to rights over a drink. Anything else you want to know, just yell.

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