Hello there....

Sitting comfortably? Then we can begin.

No more knowledge of latin required don't worry.

Age - 40-ish - although I look somewhat younger. (Not my mum's opinion)

Looks

A bit like Jason Statham - well apparently. All I can really say myself is I definitely have the same hairdo.

Just under 6 ft (5'10")
Pretty sporty physique, but I don't lift weights in front of a mirror in silly outfits.
Very sporty in fact. Competitive sportsman and swimmer. Nice bod.
Short dark hair, strong features and blue eyes.


Personality

Never a dull moment.

Can hold my own in pretty much any company. Particularly handy when you leave me with your mates, the police etc etc etc.

I CAN be verrrrrrrry very funny. Now that's easy to say......less easy to demonstrate in a dry advert but I am........trust me.

I'm confident in myself and a bit of a strong character.

Self employed, and very successful at it.

I can talk, dance and kiss. I have good manners, a pleasantly deep voice and I'm told I have "physical presence" when required. Possibly because I Was a soldier a long long time ago?


Must be something wrong with me though..........

Third ear? Hairy back? Bad breath? Smelly feet? Wearing women's underwear? Secret shoplifter?

No No No.......

But I can be feisty, stubborn, overly ambitious, occasionally grumpy, sometimes I work too hard and I'm quite unbelievably fussy.

Which brings me neatly to what I'm looking for......

You:

Very good looks
Brown or black hair, olive or dark skin.
Soft lips
Sizeable intelligence
Figure to die for
Quick wit, but able to take jokes too.
Confident
Classy
Cultured
Not majorly religious, if at all.
Mid 20-Mid 30s
Nice voice - and you won't say,"innit","Bruv" or"Babe".

If you fit those conditions you'll probably be looking for someone like me.

Cos you'll be fussy too. Or you damn well ought to be....

Pictures and/or detailed descriptions will probably receive replies.

PS You have every right to think this is bullshit, otherwise why wouldn't I have a gf or wife already?? Well I did until recently. (Gf not wife, and no kids)

PPS Its very difficult to stand out from the crowd on Gumtree and being modest and being ordinary is decidedly not a good policy. So I decided to be completely and utterly honest. (Actually if I had been really honest I would have mentioned the Aston Martin by now hehe).

I don't bite. Unless you are rude, of course.

;-)

Contact details

• Email: Click here to reply to this ad

Anti spam: Do NOT contact me offering services or anything of a commercial nature.